A dichotomy of parenting

While teaching at my last school, I recall having to seriously reconsider my views on some of my kids' parents. To be blunt, it was a rough area and there was some nasty stuff going on. More than one of the kids regularly turned up with more than suspicious bruises and a couple of the parents repeatedly relapsed into drug abuse. In general the kids weren't a bad bunch - the school had an undeserved bad reputation (since, although they could be a handful, we had ZERO occurrences of bullying etc, which IMO is far better than a school of goody-two-shoes who then beat each othe rup) but I also used to notice the little things: especially in their speech. I was fortunate enough that the state schools in the area where I grew up were of an above-average standard, and I grew up being an absolute bookworm, so I was never one to drop my t's or... well talk like a chav really.

I'd always sort of assumed that a lot of this was because of the parents - obviously kids pick up the way they speak from family. So it came as a bit of a shock when one of the mums got quite irate with her son for saying "ain't". I had to reconsider what these parents were trying to do for their kids, and how much of it was just being around other kids like them.

Today, similar situation. It's another school in a less-than-amazing area, although here there are fewer social problems, and more just that the parents aren't generally too bothered and the kids aren't learning very fast. I was stood around waiting for school to start when one Mum turned to her daughter:

What did you say?!

*cue kids looking sheepish*

What did you say?!

*kid realises she's in trouble*

*big pause from Mum*

It's oh my GOODNESS. *Child continues to look very sheepish, then turns to friend and sniggers*

Except for when it's oh my God...

At this point Mum lets kid know she's in big trouble...

2 minutes later Mum 2 walks up and starts chatting about something she read in the local Mail. About how :
Mrs X--- (one of the teachers to my kids) has f---ing mental problems! What they doin' lettin' 'er f---ing teach our kids? Wha' if she had a bad day and f---ing had one of 'em?

Now, firstly, there's one of my pet hates about how local papers blow anything of the vaguest interest completely out of proportion if it relates to teachers, scout leaders, or the clergy. I have seen firsthand the havoc that a local paper can create by printing the wrong photo, making unsubstantiated claims, leaving gaping ommissions and generally creating mountains out of molehills. As Dad, who I have come to like for being level-headed and sensible, pointed out depression isn't something that tends to make people prone to attacking small children, her previous relapses haven't affected her ability to teach, and the Mail is just working on the basis of somebody's off the cuff comments.

More pertinently, it does make me flinch a bit that somebody can be trying really hard to bring up this nice, mild-mannered, personable kids and then parents go in effing and blinding with no thought to how this will affect them. Ah well...