Misunderstandings Part 2: The Power of Prayer

"Prayer doesn't work. Try praying for a red sports car. Go on. See? Nothing happened. God doesn't exist."

The above is (loosely, because I can't find the website) taken from a page I stumbled upon with several hundred reasons why God doesn't exist. This was one of the first - I didn't get very far before finding it rather tedious and moving on. I actually rather enjoy a good debate with an atheist who has a well thought out point of view, and can actually see some of the discrepancies and troubles that the Church has. But militant atheism based on nothing more than blind faith (ironically) that sets up straw men and knocks them down just ticks me off.

So here we go: my best attempt at explaining a few things about the power of prayer.

Firstly, and probably most importantly, the above writer appears to have confused wishing with praying. Go ask your parents for $100. Or some crack. Or maybe just a really big ninja sword? Do you think they will say yes? I doubt it somehow. Go ask them for some help with your homework, or to teach you how to be patient, or ask them for a lift to the old people's home so you can go visit and cheer them up a bit. Far more likely to say yes right?

God answers our prayers, all the time: and not just the little one. At the start of this year a fresher reminded me I needed to pray big! God will often answer our genuine heartfelt prayers even when they seem impossible. But the point is that the prayers should be in line with his plan. Ask Him to be hot, or for money, or power... chances are you're not going to get anywhere. Ask Him for humility; for peace and tranquility; for the patience to persevere; for strength in your struggle against the devil... these are prayers that He will answer.

Secondly people often come to God with lots of requests. They don't realise that prayer is not a one way thing. We can't say GOD HELP ME!!! And then run away. When we come to God it should be with a humble and contrite heart.

God, I am lost, and without you I can't carry on. Show me how to.

And then we wait, and watch and listen. And sometimes you don't know the answer has come, but sometimes it's like a lightning bolt. Those are the days when you don't need faith - it's just so obvious that there's no jump in the darkness.

Thirdly many people, and often they're the people who need God most, don't understand why prayers for a relative to get better, or somebody to love them back, or the bad things to stop happening aren't answered. Graduate gave me a wonderful metaphor for that. Sometimes you see a piece of tapestry - and all the threads are crossed and it looks like a big mess. Turn it over and you see the pattern. God can see the big picture: we just get the tiny stitches that make no sense. We have to trust that we're in His hands, and that sometimes our prayers are not answered in the way we expect.

Commitment

Well that was a bit pointless.... well... not pointless... just... *sighs*

Today we had a big race: the first race of the season. In fact that's why it's a big race - it was actually a relatively small competition (there were less than 20 entries in our category), but it was our first, and I was really looking forward to some proper hard-core domination.

I can't say it came as a particular surprise that we came in the bottom half of the division. What did come as a surprise was a) that when we finished more than one person was quite happily chatting away, without really even being much out of breath and that b) so many people were so ok with how badly we'd done. I for one, while not being particularly good at this sport (probably being one of the worst non-freshers still on the team in fact) work damn hard to give it my all. When we don't train hard enough I go to the gym on my own. And I may not be perfect, but when the coach says go I give it 100%. So it REALLY hacked me off that people were ok with a thoroughly mediocre performance.

Our next race is in 10 days time and it's a big one, because it's on home territory. Right now I'm pretty disheartened that we're just going to do really badly. What happened to team events guys? What happened to giving it everything because you won't just be letting yourself down? Until fairly recently I was even considering continuing to train next term. Today just reminded me how ready I am to pack it all in. And that sucks.

It's a beautiful day!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3NmmLvfzMuE

The last 2 days have reminded me just how lucky I am to live in this city. The sky has been the most brilliant shade of blue; the air has been so crisp and clean; the sun has been shining so brightly. I live on a slight hill, a couple of miles from the city centre, and I have never realised until yesterday that at this one point on the cycle in you get a perfect view of one of the main churches in the centre. It just hit me what an amazing view that was. And then, as I came over the bridge that essentially marks the edge of the city proper there were birds singing. How awesome is that? It is, truly, a beautiful day.

Numbers Part 2

Days until my dissertation is due in: 14
Words I've written on this essay before giving up: 1551 (gotta love a palindrome)
Hours until I have to be up for training: 9.5
Times I've told myself how sad I am for working on a Friday anyway: 3
Proportion of work time I've wasted today: 40%
Comments on my blog to date: 1 :-D
People who I've told about the court verdict: 4
Blog posts I've mentally written and not typed yet: 3
Seconds off my PB on Wednesday: 8

I smell like a tart's boudoir. Just been shopping for EDT for Other Half for Valentines Day (which I'll post about another day). I have 5 different kinds of scent on - 1 on each hand, 1 on each wrist and one on my right forearm. Apparently this is very bad as I need to smell how they work with somebody's own smell: not my own. But VD is 6 days away, and I'm hardly going to say Oh just come let me spray stuff on you so I can smell it and decide what to buy you now am I?!

Hang Ups

I read a post on a blog which said something to the tune of, "just because I'm not overweight people assume I don't worry about what I weigh / how I look - but really I do." I've been wondering about my own hangups. Weight has only rarely been one of them, especially since I came to uni and took up sport again in a big way (following a lull in my teenage years). But there are other things...

This, for instance, is a life saver: because I'm forever worrying about my skin. I don't have acne or anything, but I do have a perpetually bad complexion. Not just blackheads either (but for some reason Clearasil regular scrub makes me break out) and not just on my face. Growing up I used to be teased about it (although never badly) and now I guess I have a bit of a complex.

Similarly, while I've never had big hang-ups about being overweight, it's fair to say that I've been concerned from time to time about the opposite sex finding me less than attractive. I'm a bit of a giant tbh and that's always seemed to set me apart from the crowd. Now I'm at uni, that's really less of a reason, more of an excuse - and clearly the presence of OtherHalf in my life means I'm not all bad. But I've always been out with people who were close friends first: which while it should be awesome has always left me feeling as though we just fell into it, without them ever fancying me first.

And there's another small issue: popularity. When I was little we used to go to loads of National Trust houses with adventure playgrounds. I would always come back announcing all the new friends I'd made, and all the kids I'd played with. Somehow I could just click with people I'd never met before. And yet now at uni I've really struggled. Largely because of some bad choices I made in my first year, that I've never yet resurrected but mainly just because I seem to have no social skills. I don't know when I'm being funny, and when I'm being a pain; I'm always paranoid that people don't really like me - so I either come across as needy, or when somebody jokes I take it to heart and move away; I'm no longer so sure of making plans and letting everyone else fall into line.

And also now I'm here, I get hang-ups about being smart. I'm used to being the smart kid, top of the class in everything, a high flier. And I always new coming here that I would be any more. I'm sort of ok with that: what I'm not ok with are everybody else's expectations. I don't want to let people down, so I get hang ups about not being as smart as people I'll never compare with.

So there you have it: bad skin, unattractive, unpopular and not smart. My four biggest hang-ups in a nutshell.

What is the world blogging about? Part 2

Well this week I've encountered some very interesting blogs, as well as a couple that have made me sit back in astonishment. Firstly the ones I like:

Steph and Victoria have got some really nice verses and their thoughts on Christianity, but also plenty of stuff about their every day lives, which I've enjoyed a lot. Scarlett just makes me laugh, as she's pretty quirky. (Incidentally why are all the good blogs by girls? Since when do men only write about naked women?!) And I also bizarrely found Here I Am by some 13-year-old kid who just makes me get a bit nostalgic about what it was like when school didn't matter...

And liking kids and the silly stuff they say, this also brightened my day no end.

More worryingly I found these. How many calories do you eat a day and the maximum is 1500
+!?!? Your body goes into STARVATION MODE at 1500 calories. That's barely enough to sustain basic metabolism. And there's a whole little web ring of them cheering each other on, and getting all excited when one of them gets ill and loses 3lb. People like this SCARE me.